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Video: Roy returning to the Practicing Polyamory podcast (6 October 2021)

Solo-polymory, non-hierarchical polyamory or just dating around… What’s the difference? I return to the Practicing Polyamory podcast, available on Youtube and as an audio download. I will talk about my own solo-polyamory relationship dynamic and how it is often gets confused with non-hierarchical polyamory as well as ‘dating around’, ‘playing the field’, or not wanting …

Audio: Interview with Roy on Radio WRUU Savannah

(original broadcast 21 Sep. 21) This radio station reached out to me to ask questions about polyamory and non-monogamy. The questions are intended to introduce the concept to people who may not know much about these topics, and accordingly, I try to give a broad definition as well as talking about my personal lived experience. …

Audio: Roy on the Authentic Man podcast (ep. 89)

Podcast release date 28 July 2021 I had a long chat with David Chambers of the Authentic Man podcast. Here is his intro to the episode: Polyamory is still a bit of a social taboo, but why? Have we been so entrenched in the idea that one person can only love one person at a …

What would a non-mononormative world look like?

I wanted to run a thought experiment: what would society look like if there was a complete paradigm shift, where monogamy was not the default option but instead, people would consider all relationship dynamics and choose the one right for them? Imagine that there wasn’t any focus on the 2-person dyad model of relationship ideal. …

Our body’s trauma response to jealousy

Oftentimes when jealousy kicks in, we are in a “fight or flight” mode of survival response. Our nervous system perceives a threat and wants to defend. In this article, I look at some techniques for centering and grounding yourself so that you can be get to a more empowered stance for healing.  Our nervous system …

The place between Love and Fear

How can we understand, unpack and process the emotions that we think of as jealousy? This article focuses on jealousy experienced as strong emotions and feelings. Click here to read about how our minds and thoughts influence our experience of jealousy. Our emotional response can be about socialised expectations but that does not mean that …

How lack of boundaries harmed me

If I ask you what your personal boundaries are, would you be able to tell me right away, without sinking into an existential crisis at the magnitude of the question? Until I discovered polyamory and spent a few years figuring it out, I never once stopped to think that I should have clearly defined, self-affirming …

Monogamyths - unlearning the default monogamous culture

Monogamyths – unlearning default monogamous culture

Unpacking learned social norms and expectations about relationships What do you remember from early childhood, about romantic relationships? How much of your parents’ relationship was visible to you? Their intimacy, the way they resolve conflict? Their sexuality? What was the message you were taught from society, the examples you have seen in books, TV and movies?  …