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Video: Roy returning to the Practicing Polyamory podcast (6 October 2021)

Solo-polymory, non-hierarchical polyamory or just dating around… What’s the difference? I return to the Practicing Polyamory podcast, available on Youtube and as an audio download. I will talk about my own solo-polyamory relationship dynamic and how it is often gets confused with non-hierarchical polyamory as well as ‘dating around’, ‘playing the field’, or not wanting …

Audio: Interview with Roy on Radio WRUU Savannah

(original broadcast 21 Sep. 21) This radio station reached out to me to ask questions about polyamory and non-monogamy. The questions are intended to introduce the concept to people who may not know much about these topics, and accordingly, I try to give a broad definition as well as talking about my personal lived experience. …

is polyamory right for me?

Video: Is polyamory or multigamy right for me?

5 September 2021 – Online Q&A with Roy Polyamory and other forms of multigamy (non-monogamy) have been getting a lot of exposure in recent years. They appear in mainstream TV shows and media articles in increasing frequency. This can be confusing for people who have only known monogamy as the default way of having a …

From scarcity to abundance

I believe that much of the problems and drama in relationships comes from an unconscious approach, that looks at love, sex, intimacy, touch, and attention as scarce resources that adult humans must compete for. What is a scarcity mindset? A long time ago, I used to have a strong fear of ending up old and …

Audio: Roy on the Authentic Man podcast (ep. 89)

Podcast release date 28 July 2021 I had a long chat with David Chambers of the Authentic Man podcast. Here is his intro to the episode: Polyamory is still a bit of a social taboo, but why? Have we been so entrenched in the idea that one person can only love one person at a …

What would a non-mononormative world look like?

I wanted to run a thought experiment: what would society look like if there was a complete paradigm shift, where monogamy was not the default option but instead, people would consider all relationship dynamics and choose the one right for them? Imagine that there wasn’t any focus on the 2-person dyad model of relationship ideal. …

Unicorns and Dragons

What is a Unicorn or Dragon? Why is it controversial?

Something that comes up loads in polyamory discussion threads, is the concept of the ‘Unicorn/Dragon’. It is a hot topic that carries strong opinions and often draws the ire of many polyamorous communities.For newbies, most often, a ‘unicorn’ is thought of as a bisexual woman who joins an established heterosexual couple and is equally into …

Noticing red flags in alternative relationships

A red flag means the alert that goes off, when you notice someone is behaving in a way that raises questions about how they might behave in a relationship with you, or saying things that raise suspicion of later toxic behaviour. Most red flags are common to all relationship types and dynamics, be it monogamy …

Our body’s trauma response to jealousy

Oftentimes when jealousy kicks in, we are in a “fight or flight” mode of survival response. Our nervous system perceives a threat and wants to defend. In this article, I look at some techniques for centering and grounding yourself so that you can be get to a more empowered stance for healing.  Our nervous system …