Roy Graff

Relationship Coach & Therapist

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What is Open Relating?

Open Relating means creating and maintaining conscious, connected, autonomous, expansive relationships, regardless of how many people are involved and what consensual agreements are made. Doing so requires an honest unflinching look at our own vulnerabilities, fears, needs, wants and desires. This applies to monogamy, multigamy and the entire spectrum inbetween.

I'm a relationship coach and psychotherapeutic counsellor. I offer support and guidance to individuals and partnered people. I use a variety of methodologies from my training along with extensive lived experience as a multilingual and multicultural global citizen.

I offer coaching and counselling following the Psychosynthesis modality, and am accredited by BACP and NCPS. My support is based on lived experience, a great deal of self-experimentation, exploration, a range of educational courses and over a decade of running workshops and facilitating groups. I have further training in Trauma informed therapy, Radical Honesty, Non-violent Communication and Wheel of Consent.

To make the most of this website, use the navigation bar to browse the free resources, book a session with me, watch one of my pre-recorded workshops or join an upcoming event. The resources section has a wealth of free content for education and insights, including an exhaustive glossary, free podcasts and videos and an archive of articles about relationships.

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Coaching

Relationship success varies, depending on who you are, what beliefs you have and how much autonomy you need. The relationship escalator may work for some, but for many, it doesn't. I am interested in you, and what is the best outcome for you. My coaching is for individuals and partnered people.

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Therapy

I am a qualified and accredited psychotherapeutic counsellor, trained with the Institute of Psychosynthesis and hold an MA in Psychosynthesis Psychology. Therapy is helpful for working with persistent issues of self-esteem, insecurity, depression or motivation. If you are struggling emotionally, and are looking for an open minded, understanding and trauma-informed counsellor, I'm here for you.

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Workshops and Talks

You can join the next workshop or watch pre-recorded talks about relationship dynamics, jealousy, compersion and related topics.
More videos are added on a regular basis.
Some are available for a small price, while many are free.

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Latest articles

Solo-Polyamory Day 2025

What is solo-polyamory? It is a custom-designed relationship dynamic that centres my relationship with myself. I am making a conscious decision not to seek out or work towards having a primary and/or nesting partner. Each person may practice solo-polyamory differently and the only constant is that you have a primary relationship with self. Materially, I …

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Audio: Roy on the Sexology Podcast with Dr. Nazanin Moali

Podcast release date 19 August 2025 Welcome to Episode 452 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Roy Graff who speaks to me about relationship anarchy, consensual non-monogamy, and the importance of communication in alternative relationship structures. In this episode, Roy shares his deeply personal journey from decades of serial monogamy to embracing …

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