welcoming abundance (video)

Roy speaking at the Temples of Eros social

The conscious sexuality community in London invited me to speak about Expansive Relationships. The recording of my short talk is below. It was followed by a lengthy Q&A session which I did not record, to preserve confidentiality.

Open Relating is not, contrary to what some people ask me, about open relationships. Instead, it’s a path towards an #abundance mindset, regardless of your relationship dynamic. This thread breaks it down into steps for simplicity, but this is all on a spectrum and not linear.

Step 1: Become aware of your Self. Are you open to questioning learned assumptions and beliefs and discovering your own authentic truth? Are you moving away from being what others project on you? Do you know your needs, boundaries and desires? Can you ask for what you want?

Step 2: Make as many of your relationships as you can, conscious, vulnerable, intentional and honest. See how vulnerability creates more intimacy and trust and isn’t something to fear. Notice that intimacy is not linked to a particular activity, status or relationship dynamic.

Step 3: Focus on growing empathy, first towards yourself and then for everyone in your Open Relating web of connections. Allow the love to spread and become abundant.

Step 4: Recognise that all humans (and animals) deserve to feel and be free to express the same abundance of love, intimacy, and connection. This is where true safety and security comes from – not from holding on to what you have so no one else will take it.


  • There is more about the concepts of scarcity and abundance in this article.
  • This is a longer talk about the abundance mindset.

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