Being directed from a place of love means holding abundance in your heart.
Love feels different to different people, and we cannot judge how another person feels love, based on how we feel it.
But to me, there is a deeper truth.
One thing that often gets overlooked, even in non-monogamous relationships, is that love is separate to dependence, meeting needs or having emotional support…
Those things often come packaged up in our expectation of someone we love, but are very different.
When I love someone, I want them to be the most authentic, fulfilled, realised version of themselves, whatever that means to them.
I do not want to control them or fit them into a box that I approve of. These things happen because of fear, not love.
So when I ask my partner why they are feeling jealous, and they tell me “because I love you so much”, they are not actually connected to their own truth, which is “I fear losing you so much because I am afraid to be on my own”.
When my I met my ex a year after we separated, she said to me – “I realised that me trying to control you was not about love. You don’t try to control someone you love, so I probably didn’t really love you”.