5 September 2021 – Online Q&A with Roy
Polyamory and other forms of multigamy (non-monogamy) have been getting a lot of exposure in recent years. They appear in mainstream TV shows and media articles in increasing frequency. This can be confusing for people who have only known monogamy as the default way of having a romantic and sexual relationship. It can feel scary and anxiety inducing to realise that perhaps, much that we thought we knew about relationships is incorrect or at least incomplete.
In my work, I meet clients who started questioning if monogamy is indeed the right relationship dynamic for them. I also meet clients who have a strong logical preference to non-monogamy for ideological and value reasons, and yet struggle with the practice emotionally. Over several years, in private talks and in group sessions, I have heard the fears and concerns people express about ‘opening up’, being completely honest about their desires and wants, and managing their feelings of jealousy when it comes to attempting to break out of monogamy.
In my view, there is no value hierarchy for relationship dynamics. They are along a spectrum, inviting us to consciously explore which is the right dynamic for us. As we change in our lives, so do the dynamics that may suit us.
This talk and Q&A session provides much needed context to the questions that frequently come up in my social media, my consultations and other forums. For example:
- Would polyamory be right for me?
- How can I let go of my need to hold on to my partner as my security?
- What kind of non-monogamous relationship style might suit me best?
- How can I discuss opening up, with my monogamous partner?
This is a recording of the talk, duration 48 minutes.